Choosing Joy

choosing joy jumping women

You ever have that day where everything is going great, you’re excited for the day and then something comes up that just throws off everything?! A text, a call, something someone says to you… Lovely. Now my perfectly good day is ruined. All thanks to one person. One thing. You know what I’m talking about?

I think we all actually go through experiences like that daily, but the one thing that differentiates one person’s experience from another’s is a thing called choice. In those hard moments we all have a choice to make. You can either let that person or circumstance dictate your entire day or you can choose to deal with the situation as needed then move forward and allow yourself to have a good day. Allow yourself to still experience joy and happiness. I think a lot of times we make ourselves have a horrible day because we have this screwed up thinking that we have to sit in our own misery. In all reality, we absolutely have the power to set things aside and make a choice to still experience happiness, that same day!

I believe the reason more people don’t do this is because it isn’t your natural reaction. This is most definitely a challenge. You will naturally want to talk about everything until it is exhausted out, pity party and have what happened as an excuse to mope around. Now don’t get me wrong, I believe that you should allow time to take in the moment and the emotions that you’re feeling because God gave us feelings for a reason. Feelings are a great thing. But feelings should not control you, you are in control. So there comes a time when you need to learn to cap them. Regardless of your situation there is always something to be grateful for, there is always something to find joy in. Although it is really easy to fall under havoc of those emotions, you should know, you are stronger than you think!

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Happy people, successful people, do NOT play the victim. If you want to live in peace and freedom you’ve got to toughen up. Take charge of your life and your emotions and don’t make excuses! Playing the victim may feel comforting for a short period of time but guess what, it’s not getting you anywhere. The only thing you’re going to get is some short lived attention. And as great as that attention or sympathy feels, guess what feels even better? Getting up off your butt, brushing off your shoulders and moving forward. Don’t sit in your own misery, don’t rehash what happened, don’t talk about it over and over. If you truly want a happy, full of peace life you’ve got to work for it. Challenge yourself to look at hard times as tests. And girl, pass the test. Because your time is limited. And no one else is going do it for you.

Choosing to not allow the victim mentality is one of the biggest qualities of a winner. This is not the easy route, it isn’t always comfortable, but you will skip through seasons that other people get stuck in. You will experience more joy and happiness because you will see that circumstances are just seasonal. They don’t last forever. Hard times will always come and go, unless of course you hold onto them — then they will stay around!

One of the greatest quotes I have ever heard is “Life is 10 percent what happens to you and 90 percent how you react to it.”

Gosh, if that doesn’t change how you handle every situation I don’t know what will. And it is 100 percent the truth. Which is exactly why you can find someone who has it way worse off than you are, and yet they’re loads happier than you.

Basically what I’m saying is that there is always joy to be found, but you might have to look for it. There is always something to be grateful for, but you might just have to search for it. The choice is always there, choose wisely!

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Alesha Aborady is a blogger / writer who focuses on growing through struggles, finding joy and truly living out a passionate life. Read more at

Last Updated on March 7, 2021

One comment

  1. Linda says:

    I loved the article it really hit home because I tried desperately to get forgiveness today from a estranged adult daughter. She is so hard hearted and just screamed and hollered pushed my buttons and I took part, wrong, I now see I have a choice and so does she. She is having a great pity party over what I did and just has been for two yrs now. It’s so hard on me to live without her but my choices have to change now, my choice is joy, with her or without her.She will not accept that it’s in the past that’s where she lives, in the past.She wanted me to sit by and watch her abuse my grandchild over and over in front of me no less!I was afraid to do anything like that in front of my parents, but she thinks she’s entitled to do whatever she wants even to hurt a litltle girl mentally and physically.

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