Recently, I finished writing a book on the 12 Steps: Affirm & Nurture: A New Look at 12 Steps (Minneapolis, MN: Gasscann Publishers, 2024). In the book, I give a more positive tone to some of the Steps. As I have reflected upon the Steps, what has come up is that the Steps can provide a blueprint for people who are seeking to live a healthy and creative life. The purpose of this article, then, is to name those practices that can be helpful for people beyond those of us seeking to live in sobriety from addictions.

I have come up with seven practices that I see in the 12 Steps:

• Acknowledging powerlessness and where our lives feel unmanageable
• Being aware of Higher Powers that can help us with our feelings of powerlessness
• Taking inventory of our past and present in regard both what we have done to hurt others and ourselves as well as giving thanks to those people who have supported us
• Seeking to change behaviors that harm others and ourselves
• Making direct amends and giving thanks where possible
• Finding ways to remain conscious about our lives
• Finding ways to be of service to others.

Acknowledging Powerlessness

There are many ways to experience powerlessness today. Some examples: Watching world events, experiencing the loss of important people in our lives, aging, losing a job, thinking about retiring – to name a few. I also hear today that for many of us the experience of frustration can be a source of powerlessness. The First Step suggests the importance of acknowledging and admitting our powerlessness as well as those places in our lives where we feel our lives have become unmanageable. The opposite of acknowledging and admitting is denying our experiences. This denial can lead to addictions as well as isolation from others. One expression of this is feeling shame around where we find ourselves or what we have done.

Being Aware of Higher Powers

In a book called Not God: A History of Alcoholics Anonymous (Center City, MN: Hazelden Publishing, 1979), Ernest Kurtz shares his perceptions about Higher Powers. He says simply that anyone or anything can be a Higher Power, just so it isn’t me! Kurtz’s quote enlarged the whole idea of Higher Power. Traditionally, Higher Power often was connected to the God of our understanding. Jumping off from Kurtz’s quote, I believe that a Higher Power can often be Higher Powers for individuals. I have met people over the years in my recovery groups who struggle with a God because of past experiences or never having been exposed to a God. I believe Higher Powers can be groups and communities to which we belong, a friend or partner or even a value like honesty. Our Higher Powers can be supportive people or values that we believe in. I see our Higher Powers drawing us out of isolation and enabling us to engage and connect with others.

Taking Inventory of our Past and Present

We need the help and support of others, and we are able to help and support others.There is a saying attributed to the Greek philosopher Plato, “An unexamined life is not worth living.” I see taking inventory – looking over what we have done and haven’t done – as a way to learn from our life experiences. I believe taking inventory is a good way not only to look at the harm we have done but also the good we have done. In this way, our past can become our teachers, learning from what have been our experiences. I believe it is important to focus on both the positives and negatives of our lives.

Taking inventory can also be a springboard for expressing gratitude – giving thanks for what we have been able to do, for others who have supported us through thick and thin, and what we have been able to contribute to others. Taking inventory is one way to live an examined life!

Seeking to Change Behaviors that Harm Others and Ourselves

I see this practice as not only asking for help to make these changes but also to take the steps to make the changes. Taking inventory will often lead us to see behaviors that we want to change. For some it might be holding onto resentments or easily reacting with anger. For me, it is an on-going struggle to be more patient. I have found being accountable to another or others can be helpful in making the changes we want to make. It is more difficult to try to do this alone. 

Making Amends and Giving Thanks

This practice follows from what I said before about taking inventory and examining our lives. Are there people we can apologize to for what we did or didn’t do? And are there people whom we can thank for their love and support? I see both as helping us be more intentional and conscious about our lives.

Praying and Meditating to Remain Conscious

There are many ways to pray and meditate. This Step is about finding ways to remain conscious and aware. It is again seeking to live an examined and intentional life. In my Catholic tradition, there are four ways to pray: Acknowledging the Higher Power in our lives; making amends as well as receiving the forgiveness of others; asking for what we need; and giving thanks for what we have been given. I suggest trying these ways of praying and see whether they help you become more aware of what is happening in your life. Praying can also be a conversation with a friend.

Meditating can be as simple as slowing down and becoming aware of our breathing as a way of connecting with ourselves. A way of meditating that I have found helpful over many years is journaling – giving expression in a private space of one’s journal for what is going on in our lives as well as our hopes and actions we wish to take. This practice is really about how we can remain conscious and aware of what is happening in our lives.

Service

I believe that an important aspect of being alive for each of us is being a social animal, able to interact with others. In this regard, I remember the ol’ adage that no one is an island. I believe a special aspect of this socialness is being able to be of service to others as well as allowing others to share their gifts and talents with us. We need the help and support of others, and we are able to help and support others. In this regard, I am often reminded of the words in the beginning of the Hebrew Bible in the Book of Genesis where God says to the first human it is not good for humans to be alone. We need each other – it is not good for us to isolate.

Conclusion

So, these are my thoughts and reflections on seeking to apply the practices of the 12 Steps to everyday living. I hope these practices that I named can help you live a healthy and creative life. I am always open to feedback. The benefit of being in dialogue and in community.

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Mark Scannell is an avid 12 Stepper and recently published a book on the 12 Steps: Affirm & Nurture: A New Look at 12 Steps: Minneapolis MN, Gasscann Publishing, 2024. We may earn a commission via some of the links on this page, at no cost to you.

Last Updated on February 21, 2025