“Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.” The Serenity Prayer

The above prayer is familiar to almost everyone around the world today, regardless of whether they are members of Alcoholics Anonymous (AA). I personally discovered The Serenity Prayer when I was grieving the sudden loss of my first husband, more than twenty years ago. It spoke to me of strength, patience, courage, and wisdom at a time when I was struggling with the fabric of life itself. It gave me hope in a time of darkness.

Conflicting sources dispute the actual words of The Serenity Prayer itself, with misquotations and various translations in circulation. However, the underlying principles remain the same. But just like its content, the origins of The Serenity Prayer have a hotly disputed history too. Did Niebuhr pen the original Serenity prayer? Or was he “inspired” by earlier scholars?

This is what I found when I went looking for answers.

Where it All Began

Reinhold Niebuhr (1892-1971) is widely accredited with authorship of The Serenity Prayer, a decade or so before it became popularized by Alcoholics Anonymous in 1941. But was he really the author? Over the years, it has been speculated that original authors might have been Greek philosopher Aristotle (384 BC-322 BC), St. Francis of Assisi (c.1181-1226), Dutch philosopher Baruch Spinoza (1632-1677), Evangelical devotee Friedrich Oetinger (1702-1782) or even Sanskrit authorship.¹ Similar writings and prayer words have been recorded or deciphered from ancient inscriptions and buildings including one from an Egyptian obelisk.¹

So, did Niebuhr pen the original prayer, or was he inspired by some of these earlier writers and prayers that he may have come across? Even Niebuhr himself seemed unsure: “When questioned about the prayer, [he] was unassuming— and modestly conceded the possibility that he had assimilated its concept from some earlier, forgotten source—but made clear that he believed he had originated it.”²

As to the date of the writing, if Niebuhr did indeed pen the original Serenity Prayer, that is also a matter of contention. Dates range from 1931 through to the early 1940s when it was discovered by a member of Alcoholics Anonymous (AA).

Adoption by the Recovery Community³

An obituary in The New York Herald Tribune is attributed as being the source of the publication of The Serenity Prayer in 1941. Although names often vary, the most frequently quoted name that appears as the Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) member who cut out the newspaper clipping of the prayer from The New York Herald Tribune is Ruth Hock. She brought it to the group’s founder (and AA’s co-founder), William Griffith Wilson (often identified as Bill W. in Alcoholics Anonymous literature).Soon the prayer, as published in The New York Herald Tribune, was printed and circulated on cards for AA members.

It spoke to me of strength, patience, courage, and wisdom at a time when I was struggling with the fabric of life itself.

The Words of the Prayer

Like all things in historical storytelling, the actual words and facts are often lost to the mists of time, either due to the way it is recorded or because it is recorded by more than one source. The Serenity Prayer is no different. The shortened version of the prayer adopted by AA is:

God grant me the serenity
To accept the things I cannot change;
Courage to change the things I can;
And wisdom to know the difference.

However, according to Niebuhr’s daughter, Elisabeth Sifton, Niebuhr himself preferred the following version:²

God, give us grace to accept with serenity the things that cannot be changed,
courage to change the things that should be changed,
and the wisdom to distinguish the one from the other.

As Niebuhr was a church minister, it has been suggested that he was using the prayer in church services long before it was publicized. Different versions appeared because of the way that it was presented through church services. Nothing was written; essentially, it was oral history, and oral history has a tendency to be changed over time.

As a writer myself, I go through writing various drafts before I settle on the final version of an article, poem, or book. Therefore, it is not surprising to me if this was indeed the reason for the changes in wording that one sees over time.⁴

I am not sure if we will ever know the true origin of the prayer beyond speculation and doubt. But one thing is certain. It is now an integral part of the AA community.

Why The Serenity Prayer Matters

Many AA members have cited the prayer as being pivotal and “a lifesaver” to their sobriety. It is recited at the start of every AA meeting. Members seek out the words when they are struggling or in crisis. So, what does the prayer mean?

The Serenity Prayer focuses on four core principles: serenity, courage, acceptance, and wisdom.⁵ Furthermore, “The Serenity Prayer’s main message is to let go of situations beyond your control and take action towards things you can control, while also knowing to know what is within your control and what isn’t. The prayer also emphasizes acceptance and to live in the present moment.”⁵ The Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation adds that it “is about recognizing what you can control, letting go of what you can’t, and taking action when possible.”⁶

For me personally, in a time of profound grief, I found comfort in the words as I navigated what was, at that early point in my life, a crisis of a magnitude that I had not faced before and I was at a loss on how to move forward. Family and friends—and even therapists—didn’t know what to say. Yet, this prayer gave me strength in a few powerful words: Serenity, Courage, Wisdom. And it gave me the strength and patience to navigate ahead.

Regardless of its origins, its original wording, and how it is interpreted by different people, The Serenity Prayer has stood the test of time since Alcoholics Anonymous adopted it. It has helped thousands of people. And it demonstrates the power of some carefully chosen words.

References

1. Wing, N. (1981). Grapevine (The International Journal of Alcoholics Anonymous): ORIGIN OF THE SERENITY PRAYER: A HISTORICAL PAPER. Retrieved August 21, 2026, from https://www.aa.org/sites/default/files/literature/assets/smf-129_en.pdf
2. Yale Alumni Publications, Inc. (n.d.). Yale Alumni Magazine: Who wrote The Serenity Prayer? (July/Aug 08). https://archives.yalealumnimagazine.com/issues/2008_07/serenity.html
3. Admin. (2018, August 7). AA History. Rehab4addiction. https://www.rehab4addiction.co.uk/aa-history.html
4. Author’s own opinion.
5. Jaclyn, Jaclyn, & Jaclyn. (2024, August 1). The Serenity Prayer’s Role in 12-Step Recovery. White Sands Treatment | Best Rehab Center in Florida for Drug and Alcohol Treatment. https://whitesandstreatment.com/2024/08/01/serenity-prayer/
6. Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation. (2025, October 10). The Serenity Prayer in addiction recovery. Hazelden Betty Ford Recovery. Retrieved August 21, 2026, from https://www.hazeldenbettyford.org/articles/the-serenity-prayer

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Sharon Chapman is a published author, writer, and poet. She is the Editor in Chief for The Phoenix Spirit and regularly writes and edits for private clients, in addition to her own work. She recently published Fire Over Ice: A Collection of Poems About Overcoming Emotional Abuse which can be found on Amazon.