Category: Emotional Health

When We Pretend to Have an Identity

“Oh yes, I’m the great pretender, Pretending that I’m doing well, My need is such I pretend too much, I’m lonely but no one can tell…” —From Buck Ram’s “The Great Pretender” These days too many of us lack an identity. We may say we are our own persons and claim to be independent. Yet …

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Loneliness and Recovery

I believe an important report was recently issued by the Surgeon General of the United States, Dr. Vivek Murthy, at the beginning of May of this year. I see this report as having repercussions for all Americans of all ages as well as special ramifications for those of us wrestling with issues of addiction and …

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Doing a Disappearing Act

“Where was I? I’m here. At least I think I’m here. Wasn’t I?” —Josh, multiple tour Marine Veteran, Iraq War Most of us grasp that people exposed to overwhelming horrors may feel that life is just not nailed down for them. A part of them lives in a seemingly rewarding present world while another part …

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Minding the Mind

The Phoenix · Minding the Mind “Mindfulness allows you to live deeply every moment that is given to you to live.” Thich Nhat Hanh Zen Buddhist master, teacher, and writer Thich Nhat Hanh died in January of this year at the age of 95. He introduced many Westerners to the practice of mindfulness and the …

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Becoming a Better Version of Yourself

Most of us don’t think much about what type of person we are. We have a hard enough time attending to the practical details of daily living—staying virus-free, caring for children, paying the bills, having enough food in the house, and knowing what our next project is at home. Few of us would choose having …

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When You’re In Your Head A Lot

I hang out quite a bit with a rather attractive blond at my fitness club. We discuss our workout routines and how to improve our times on the machines. We’re always chatting. She has a very nice smile. Most of my friends at the club, knowing we are both single, are on me. They say, …

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Living With Unidentified Trauma Symptoms

“One who returns to a place sees it with new eyes. Although the place may not have changed, the viewer inevitably has. For the first time things invisible before become suddenly visible. —Louis L’Amour  I’ve always felt there is something fundamentally wrong with me. Sometimes I get these anxiety spells out of the blue. …

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When Every Other Day is About Ought’s and Should’s

“You don’t really control anything.” —Sheldon B. Kopp, Psychotherapist and Author All of us have times when we’re obligated to carry out duties as part of normal life rituals. Having relatives visit us from out of town may prompt us to clean our houses ahead of time and get the guest rooms ready. Doing so …

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How to Not Take Things So Personally

“No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.” Eleanor Roosevelt, This Is My Story I had an eye-opening experience at church last week. A bunch of ladies at our coffee hour were all talking about their adult kids and how well they were adjusting to the challenges of college life. Being that my …

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